Food for Future Years

(A poem inspired by William Wordsworth’s

“Lines Composed a Few Miles Above Tintern Abbey”)

Today I lectured on Wordsworth.

“Lectured” – pshaw!

I strutted and crowed and danced on the balls of my feet.

I pathetically attempted to convey the ebullience

that eddied through my softened heart

in much the same way that the poet seemed to reach beyond his reach

to corral with words that moment when we

“see into the life of things.”

I spoke of nature and meditation

and the place of wisdom that lives beyond consciousness.

I stretched synonyms and cajoled imagery

to see if any words were worth

the moment of experience

when soul touches soul,

mind touches nature,

all that is touches all I am.

I lifted my arms, my eyes, my voice,

as I tried to carry a roomful

of baby scholars

to the banks of the River Wye.

I engaged every descriptive power

I have ever possessed

to give them just a whisper of an idea

about the presence, the sense, the spirit

which lives in the blissful moment of

pure connection,

and which the poet

dared to attempt to explain

though he knew better than all of us

how futile that effort would surely be.

I tried.  Oh, how I tried.

And then I looked at the rows of faces,

some blank and unreadable,

but some smiling, some nodding,

some radiating the knowing,

and I knew.

I had not transported them to Tintern Abbey.

We had traveled together to this moment,

a moment of pure connection,

that the poet would reach beyond reach

to dare to attempt to explain.

Catching Chickens

Valentine loves to be held.

     She pecks at my jeans, squints into the sun, practically begs.

But she’s scrawny and hen-pecked.

     Comb always bloody.  Knobby feet.

The others I’ve never touched.

     Sure, as downy chicks.  Never since.

Stunning creatures proudly strutting,

     Every tail feather in place.

I’ve tried several methods of capture.

     Step One – Earn Trust.  Hand feed them.

          Cabbage.  Carrots.  Cauliflower.

     Step Two – Employ subterfuge.

          Stoop down still as a stone, and then –

     Step Three – Cut off escape.  Corner one.

          I do not recommend step three.

I’m working on a poem about catching chickens.

     First attempt – Focus.  Concentrate.  Think chickens.

                    So much depends on a red wheelbarrow

     Second attempt – Relax.  Clear your mind.  Try NOT to think.

                    About a red wheelbarrow glazed with rainwater

     Third attempt – Just write.  Stream of consciousness.

                    Just . . . a stream . . . beside the white chickens

Some poems beg to be written.

     I’ve held one or two.

But they’re usually jerky.

     Scrawny symbolism.  Knobby feet.

Others strut across the page.

     Stunning.  Majestic.

     Almost untouchable,

          But so worth the chase.

Thinking It Through

What would happen if I did what I want?

If I wrote instead of working (as if writing is just a big bowl of warm blackberry cobbler with ice cream and not actually work).  If I took all the eggs out of the money-must-be-earned-to-pay-these-bills basket and put them in the passion-lives here-but-you might-starve basket.  If I made a dream a priority.

What would happen if I changed the whole shape and tenor of my life?

If I dared to leap.  If I leapt to dare.  If I measured possibilities for joy instead of the risks of coming up short.

What would happen if one time, just one time, I didn’t analyze, consider, ponder, determine potential outcomes, weigh options, choose wisely?  What would happen if I did not prepare words in advance?  What would happen if I tore up the balance sheet I keep for money?  And grudges.  And me-and-you.

What would happen if I dismantled the system I’ve constructed called “How To Get Through Life” and replaced it with a merry-go-round of pink horses and red dragons and blue dolphins?  If I stopped marching to so many different drummers and danced like a dervish instead.  If I laughed more and growled less.

What would happen if I took the painting of the me I have allowed the world to see, covered it in white, and started again?  With brighter colors this time, bolder strokes, a little less Baroque and a little more Impressionism.

What would happen if I did what I want?

I’ll you what would happen.  I’d be living from my heart.

Springing

First the daffodils.

Then the tulips.  Red, yellow, pink. 

Lettuce is crisping in the cool morning air.

The cucumber magnolia sends out tiny shoots at the end of each branch.

The sycamores will make a late grand entrance, but until then there are the oaks, hackberries, and redbuds getting back to business. 

The cedar and cyprus have held a green vigil through the dark death of winter, but now they catch the fever and dance a little perkier in the breeze. 

The pine will start new quills to write the lovesongs of robins and chickadees, bluejays and cardinals.

Lavender, oregano, and mint are suddenly alive again.  

Rosemary dresses up and puts on her perfume. 

Hyacinths are bursting blue.  

 

The wheel will turn and spring will

become summer

become fall

become winter.

          But today is spring,

And I am bursting blue.